The Scary Truth

I have always been scale-averse. Mostly because I felt like the numbers didn't really matter as long as I still fit into my jeans. However, I decided that part of the reason I end up putting back on weight after I lose it is because I can't see the little pounds creeping back on. I only notice something is wrong when I have to go back to my size 6 jeans (and by size 6, I mean Gap size 6 which is most other brands size 8 or 10).

So, I decided that this time around I need the numbers. Like any good academic I decided that I need all the numbers. After a little Amazon browsing and customer review reading I settled on a digital bathroom scale, a highly recommended body fat loss monitor and an easy-to-use measuring tape. Thanks to Amazon Prime they have all arrived and been used. These things are the fastest ticket to self-esteem loss. I have literally never been so upset about myself in my life. Here is a recap of my afternoon:

The Tape
The measuring tape wasn't too bad because I have nothing to compare against. (Except for Bobby who I convinced to let me measure his thighs to settle an age old debate about whose were bigger . . . thank god, Bobby's were. But by not a very slim margin.) After figuring out that I almost have man-sized thighs, I moved on to all the other vital stats:

• Neck ---- 12.75 in.
• Chest --- 38 in.
• Biceps --- 12.25 in. (why are these almost the same size as my neck? Is this normal?)
• Waist --- 31.25 in.
• Hips --- 42.50 in.
• Thigh --- 25.50 in.
• Calf --- 15 in. (again, should this be this big?)

After debating what my goals should be for this, I decided the best would be to look at the size charts for my favorite stores: Gap and JCrew. I also found some 'ideal/average' stats off of a questionable website that I believe was intended for men who wanted to become women.Based on these stats I should be size 12, and wear at least a large t-shirt. I am sitting right now in a pair of size 6 long and lean jeans from Gap and a small shirt from American Apparel. Go figure. So, my goal is going to based off of the Ideal measurements which would place me at somewhere between a size 4-6 at Gap and JCrew (at least on their charts!).

The Scale
In more bad news, my new scale is evil. I have not weighed myself on a scale since I was at my doctors office in August. I believe that it was somewhere around 140-142. The new scale has placed me at an exact 150 pounds. This thing reads in .2 pounds but for some reason I am exactly 150. I have never ever in my life imagined that I would weigh this much.

Also, this means that my drivers license could now officially qualify as a fake ID. My drivers license maintains that I am 5 ft. 1 in. and 110 pounds. This was true . . . when I was a 15 and 7 months old and getting my drivers permit. I am really quite ashamed of this number (the 150, not the glorious days of 110 that remain on my ID) but it is also fairly sobering that regardless of how I feel about it, I really need to get my weight under control to be healthy. So after feeling pretty miserable about this number, the UPS man dropped off the body fat loss monitor. Oh God.

Body Fat Loss Monitor
The description on this thing should have been my first clue: "The Omron HBF-306C Body Fat Analyzer measures your body fat with a gentle, micro electrical current -- don't worry, you won't feel it. The key to long-term exercise success is accurate body fat composition measurement."

Don't worry. I didn't feel it. I did feel the crushing weight of my BMI and body fat being calculated to show that I am on the high end of both. My BMI is 27.7 and my body fat is 32.8%. Here is why that is bad:
- The healthy range for my BMI is: 18.5 - 24.9
- The healthy range for my body fat is: 21.0 - 32.9

So my BMI is definitely too high and my body fat range is just barely within the correct range. Phew. My work is cut out for me. So is cheese.

My Verdict
I am finally facing the cold hard reality that I have major misconceptions about my level of health. I know that I don't do enough exercise and that I have a habit of eating more than I should. But, seeing numbers that basically scream that I am putting myself at risk for serious problems later in my life is a little scary. Part of the problem is that I am sooooo short. I feel like I have a serious disadvantage because in order to be squarely within my healthy BMI I need to be sitting at between 104 - 131 pounds. I will never every get back to under 115 without looking seriously skinny and the reason for that is that I have hips. You know, those things that get nice and wide so we can give birth to babies! Well, I have some pretty serious hips and they are made of BONE. I can't get that to go away. Grrr.
On the bright side, I am only 23 and I know that I have the time to fix my weight and gain control over my health before I get into dangerous territory. And if it means that I will get to go shopping at JCrew without fearing that nothing will fit me that might take some of the pain out of the brutal work ahead. Look forward to hopefully more cheery posts as these numbers start to go down...